Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Mom Dream

When someone you love dies, every now and then, some more often than others, you dream about them.   It is a very moving experience.  I have lost both of my parents.  My most moving dad memory came at a birthday shortly after his death (and he died 2 days after my 36th birthday).  In my dream he was there as we were celebrating my birthday.  In my family's home.  We were having a customary family dinner and we all looked at him, somehow we were also in Kansas and I remember saying to him and thinking, "what are you doing here?  you are dead?"  He smiled his crooked smile and said, "it's your birthday, I had to wish you a happy birthday."  I almost never dream about my dad, but this one I cherish in the very heart of me.  Not because I think he magically communicated with me in my dream, but because it was what I needed.

For as much as I love and miss her, I rarely dream of mom.  Last night I did and I am seeing a theme.  I can barely hear her.  Last night she was calling me on the phone and just as I answered everything got noisy around me.  I knew it was her and I kept trying to block everything else out and hear her.  I was able to some, still frustrated, but even in my dream I knew it was a dream and I cherished the sound of her voice.  I think she was wishing me a happy birthday too. The sound of her voice made me smile in my dream and I awoke smiling and thinking, WOW I dreamt about mom!!!!

I miss my family.  Nothing here in KS compares.  Chris dreams of moving to CO and I have my doubts that I will ever find that close bond. Maybe we can have my family  move near us in CO.