When someone you love dies, every now and then, some more often than others, you dream about them. It is a very moving experience. I have lost both of my parents. My most moving dad memory came at a birthday shortly after his death (and he died 2 days after my 36th birthday). In my dream he was there as we were celebrating my birthday. In my family's home. We were having a customary family dinner and we all looked at him, somehow we were also in Kansas and I remember saying to him and thinking, "what are you doing here? you are dead?" He smiled his crooked smile and said, "it's your birthday, I had to wish you a happy birthday." I almost never dream about my dad, but this one I cherish in the very heart of me. Not because I think he magically communicated with me in my dream, but because it was what I needed.
For as much as I love and miss her, I rarely dream of mom. Last night I did and I am seeing a theme. I can barely hear her. Last night she was calling me on the phone and just as I answered everything got noisy around me. I knew it was her and I kept trying to block everything else out and hear her. I was able to some, still frustrated, but even in my dream I knew it was a dream and I cherished the sound of her voice. I think she was wishing me a happy birthday too. The sound of her voice made me smile in my dream and I awoke smiling and thinking, WOW I dreamt about mom!!!!
I miss my family. Nothing here in KS compares. Chris dreams of moving to CO and I have my doubts that I will ever find that close bond. Maybe we can have my family move near us in CO.
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